Serving Justice

Smack! Down flew my hand to victory! As morning dawned, and the first rays of light seeped into my bedroom between drawn window blinds, I slew the Evil Mosquito King of Doom. That little feller had enough of my blood in him to be my relative, but that didn’t stop me from murdering him in cold blood. Well, make that warm blood. Mine. Fresh. Little Vampire!

I staggered from the battle scene into the bathroom to nurse my wounds and dispose of my dead advarsary. Mattie had long since deserted the battlefield for a cooler, less mosquito ridden atmosphere. After washing the mosquito down the sink, I inspected my leg– four fresh bites. Then I looked in the mirror. My right eyelid was swollen to obesity and flopped grotesquely over my eyelashes. Hey, I thought, I really do look like a casualty of war.

After all, I am a veteran. India. Summer of ‘06. Slathered in my secret armor, Coppertone Bug ‘n Sun lotion, I endured many a sticky night, outwitting the enemy and waging the battle for sleep to the threatening roar of the swamp cooler. There was the day I took out Sir Obnoxious the Evil Fly with one fell flick of the fingernail and smeared his evil fly remains apon the back window of the jeep, there to rot forever. It was really quite impressive and I should have been decorated.

Now, however, I’m back at home, a weathered soldier of sorts, once again engaging in a battle for my honor, my family, my sleep. Oh, I’ve witnessed the havocs of this war. Not just a bulging eyelid or a leg smattered with evidences of sinister blood-slurping. It’s the sight of my family members in the morning, reduced to strained, sunken-eyed zombies, deprived of the freedom to sleep in peace.

Well, I’d better (yawn) get moving. Duty calls. I need to look up the life span of the average female mosquito, and possibly tend the casualties of yet another battle. If I never post again, you’ll know my unfortunate demise. I quote from the dank walls deep in the bowels of Chateau D’If, one time prison of the Count of Monte Cristo– "God will give me justice!"

(actually wrote this yesterday morning but didn't post then, obviously.)